After the difficulties of the past few weeks, I thought we could all use a break. Since this is a family blog, it occurred to me that it might be fun to introduce our extended kin to this forum. I couldn't think of a better place to start than with my most interesting relative, Baby Carl.
Baby Carl is my father's half brother. He is so named bacause my father is also Carl, and my father's father was also a Carl. So in my family you have Big Carl (my grandfather), Little Carl (my father), and Baby Carl (my half uncle). Baby Carl wasn't raised by my grandfather, who suffered from wanderlust and nearly died trying to build a hunting lodge in Somalia. (You can read a little about that episode here.) So Baby Carl goes by another last name--Cestari.
If this wasn't interesting enough, Baby Carl has distingished himself in his profession by becoming a master teacher of something called 'gutterfighting.' This is a philosophy of hand-to-hand combat that combines martial art dicipline and dirty tricks to deliver the greatest and swiftest lethality, should you really need to kill someone in a fight. Baby Carl can explain it much better than I can. You can read one of his manifestos here, including these short-cut tips to mortal combat:
*Attack the throat with the INTENTION of crushing it! No brainer.
*Attack the anterior/lateral carotid triangle. One of TWO primary KO points. Kyusho/Dim Mak this *AIN'T! Just "hammer" the bastard. Fast, hard and often is the key phrase!
*Attack the cervical spine/C-1 - dens bone attachment.
*Attack the head/brain case. Now here we get interesting. The goal in attacking the head should be, in my opinion, to cause ACUTE TRAUMATIC BRAIN INJURY. Other possible injuries are secondary. *Attack with the intention of causing massive "coup contra coup" brain trauma, either through translational or rotational impact. Cause severe "kinking" of the brain stem, either by hyper flexion or extension. Forget the "death touch" stuff. THIS IS HOW people in the real world get Fucked up.
What does this all mean? Baby Carl has starred in a series of videos demonstrating his fighting techniques that have become the rage of the underground extreme-fighting types. The videos now retail for hundreds of dollars. Fortunately, a few choice clips are available on You Tube. You will recognize Baby Carl by his missing his ring finger on his right hand. You will also notice that we Paneros fight dirty.